faded painting... 007

In the space of six minutes, there was a moment of clarity. It vanished six hours later.

In the twilight, inside a cave like temple, with no way out, I was facing a deity, a large black life size statue. I was scared. Confused is a more appropriate word. I just stood there interpreting and trying to figure out what I am supposed to do. I woke up, ruffled my head and slipped back into sleep.

I was on the escalator at the station, watching my back, looking over my shoulder, somewhat anxious, avoiding something that I could only sense, but not see. Then she was there, with him. She increased her pace to reach the escalator. She was stopped by the other people standing on the steps. I was not sure if she saw me, but I was unable to move farther away myself.

By the time I was at the exit, she was with me. I told him I will take care of things and the older man was off. I was not trying to move away anymore. I sensed something else. Then I saw someone one else standing at the bus stop, at a distance, smiling, alone, looking to her left, looking at the watch, not exactly giving an impression of waiting for anyone. She was there just as if she was meant to be there and then, just doing what she was doing. I went around the bus stop with the one I was walking with, not exactly avoiding the one at the bus stop, and entered a coffee shop. I had the coffee tokens in my hand and handed it to the supply counter. I said "two coffees, please". He said, "that's one coffee and one plain milk", he was pointing at the tokens. I was not aware that I had bought one of each. He also asked "don't you come at 8 to the office? why do you need tea from here?". I remembered that my office was just the next building. I told him, "well, coming here gives a chance for some fresh air". He acknowledged with a nod. Anyway, I gave her the milk and I almost spilled my 'tea'. "Odd", I thought. I looked at her and I realized, I was very very calm. I was clear, even if things around me were just a little skewed here and there... Just the little things, just a little odd, here and there. And at this particular time, it was not bothering me in the least. I had never felt so clear in my mind. We did not say anything. I noticed that she had what looked like study material. I told her, "finish up, let's take a walk, I want to talk to you". She had books in her hands. There was such an infectious peace about her. She transferred it each time she looked at me straight and unblinking, between the sips. Her face was familiar, in an odd way. A mix of features that I recognized individually, but not the entire face. The eyes...

I was going to take her to the little park bench nearby and tell her that I wanted her to stay a little longer, and just sit there in the fresh air. She was going to point at the books and say she's to finish up her reading, there's a test tomorrow. I was going to ask her if she could concentrate after having been here. Then I was going to answer for her myself, after looking into the unperturbed peace in her eyes, by saying that I was just kidding. But of course, before any of that could happen, I woke up again.

I sang, quietly. Danced around, with poise. I carried the peace into the Sunday office, made hay on the Sunday and returned home after six hours... only to realize I have forgotten the face. The eyes... I remember the person in the bus stop though, with the smile. Still looking at no one in particular, to her left, just looking at the watch like a life-size signboard, repeating her actions over and over again...slowly, almost methodically... I know who you are, but what are you doing?